My Aunt Verna

I have to make this my personal blog because I deleted my other one last year. My aunt Verna died yesterday morning. She was my favorite aunt. I hadn't seen her for a while and she lived not too far away. I'm glad I got to see her twice recently before she died. She was 90 so she lived a pretty long life. She lost her husband quite a while back. That's the hard part of getting older because everyone dies. A lot of my aunts and uncles have died and my father died 13 years ago. I guess I was upset yesterday and depressed and I needed to distract myself and what did I get, just more depressed. I didn't think I'd be so sad about her dying.
Last month my aunt broke her leg because a dog in their next door neighbor's yard scared her. She was outside screaming and in pain for over an hour before anyone heard her. That was just terrible to hear and that she suffered like that. Then she was in pain until she died. At least now her pain is all gone.
I'll always remember her smiling at me and she used to have this special wave when we said goodbye when I was a kid. She called it a monster wave. I can just seeing her waving at me. I spent a lot of time at my aunt and uncle's house, more time than any of my other relatives. I can still remember my uncle Peter her husband. She's lived a while without him and now hopefully she'll see him again.
I always remember all the special people that have come and gone in my life. They will always be in my memory and nothing can ever take that away. Sometimes I wish I could still see these people and talk to them, but now I can only see them in my memories.

It was sick and sad going on that CW message board and being treated like shit yet again because of fictional characters that are just that. I love these fictional characters but I don't see the need to defend them or try to hurt someone real over them. It's stupid and sad. I guess that certain someone on there has no one in her life and is so obsessed that she needs to spend her whole day on there patrolling the board and worrying about who's bashing Dean or Sam. Who cares? And the other one must love spending her time there too and looking for other posters she can turn into the mods over nothing. It's just ridiculous. Maybe I needed a distraction and I wanted to talk and think about something besides my aunt dying, but I won't try again on there to talk to anyone. It's totally pointless and worthless. They all just want to cry and whine over either Sam or Dean. Or the show sucks now and they want it to be like it was before. I love how it is now and I don't care how Sam acts or Dean acts or whatever. It's entertainment and I love Supernatural and won't stop loving it and all the characters. I love real people too and not just TV people. I sometimes wish I could tell all my family how much I love them. I hope they know. Sometimes I want to punch my older brother or my older sisters and then sometimes I want to hug them and tell them I love them.
I guess I can just start staying here on my blog to post personal things and just go there with crazy theories and stuff. I don't know if anyone gets a laugh or anything out of what I write on there, but if they do, then I'm glad. That's why I write on there and I try to make people laugh or feel better about the show. I try to be as positive as I can, but all I seem to get is negative crap thrown at me.

I hope there is a Heaven and that all my relatives and the people I've loved are there right now together. I sometimes believe in reincarnation. It's interesting and it would be nice. It would be nice if you could choose what you want to come back as. An animal or a person a plant or whatever. It's nice to think about it. It's nice to think that you do go on forever somewhere. Here and somewhere else.