Roses

Here are some old pics of me when I was a really little girl. Our roses were so beautiful on the side of our house. Some of the rose bushes are still alive and I keep leaving them there, but they are starting to get really thorny now and some of them have died. I want to tear out all the old ones and plant new ones, so that the side of the house will look the same as it did when I was little. I hate yard work, so mostly I just leave them alone. I have to pull weeks and creeping vines out of them and a stupid tree has gotten into them and started growing. That's why I need to start over.
I remember when I was a kid and how I took roses and tried to preserve them in water. I thought they would stay beautiful and never die if I put them in water in an old frosting container. I wanted their beauty to stay forever, but that was not the way for it to be. I learned that their beauty stayed forever in my memory and I thought about them in the long cold winters and saw them blooming in my mind.
Then come spring, there would be new beautiful roses growing.
I love looking at old pics and remembering all that I had growing up. Some would say that I didn't have much, but I was rich in ways some people will never experience. Sometimes, when I've been angry, I have forgotten all that I have and have had in my life.
I sometimes wonder why when I gamble and win money, I throw it back and lose it all. Maybe, I really just don't want or need it. Money has never made me feel rich, only love has. When I have love in my heart and life, then I'm feel like I'm the richest person in the world.