I guess at times when you've lost all hope, a surprise comes totally out of the blue and makes you believe again. I watched Supernatural tonight mainly for Jared. I love him and I hope he's okay with all the crap that idiots are saying about him. I hope he just ignores it and keeps doing what he does because he's one of the best actors ever. Maybe he hasn't won a stupid academy award or he's not some big name star, but he is a wonderful person and that's what matters. And when I watch him, he makes me feel happy.
Now on to the episode. This was the best episode of Supernatural I've seen in almost two years. Why? Finally we got to know what Sam was thinking and so did Dean. I love how Dean goes on and on about wanting Sam to have a life and have a wife someday and kids, but still either hunt or be a Man Of Letters. When is Sam supposed to do this? When he's like fifty or sixty years old. Dean sold his soul to bring Sam back from the dead in season 2, but he didn't give a crap how that was going to affect Sam. All he cared about was losing his little brother. Then the whole year before Dean went to Hell, he kept telling Sam to let him go, but he didn't care that Sam would be all alone and miss him. Dean just told him to hunt and remember everything he and their father taught him. Then Dean went to hell and sure he suffered for how many years down there, but he also tortured and enjoyed every minute of it.
Then Sam sacrificed himself to save the world by being possessed by Lucifer and all he wanted was for Dean to have a normal life and a family. He didn't want Dean to hunt and be miserable. He wanted him to go to Lisa and Ben and have a good life and Dean was pretty much enjoying it because he sure did miss it. Then when Dean found out Sam didn't have his soul. Dean had to go and get it. He didn't do that for Sam, he did it for himself because he couldn't stand Sam the way he was. Even after Death basically showed him what screwing up the natural order of things would do, Dean did it anyway. He said he was doing it for Sam, but he really did it for himself.
I love how when Sam had his soul back and after Castiel busted the wall in Sam's mind, Dean didn't really care all that much how Sam was suffering. Dean was more worried about Sam turning psycho and killing people. The sad thing is, Sam would rather die than have other people hurt or die because of him. Dean doesn't seem to get that. That's something Sam has to live with now. He has to live with all the people that have died because he lived.
I love how some fans are so sad about Dean losing everyone and even Dean himself sniveled about everyone he loves dying around him. I guess that doesn't happen to Sam, even though he's lost about the same amount of people he's loved and cared about as Dean and maybe more,. It's like Dean thinks he's all alone even when he's with Sam. Like he has to carry everything because Sam will mess it up or something.
Sam has let Dean go. Sam tried to have a life with Amelia when Dean disappeared and was in Purgatory. Sam was able to let Dean go, where Dean wants to cling to Sam.
Something about this episode I found interesting. Dean wanted to kill that lady monster, I can't remember what she was, but he wanted to kill her. Why? Because she gave up her killing brother and let them kill him. Just like with Amy. Amy killed to try and save her son. I wonder how many people Dean would kill or let die to save Sam. Is that why Dean killed Amy, because he saw himself in her and he couldn't stand it. Or maybe it was because she once saved Sam when Dean was not there to do it. If it hadn't have been for Amy, Sam would have been dead as a teenager.
Dean lets certain monsters live, but not others. I guess he only lets the ones he likes live. I also love how Dean says he's going to kill Crowley, but always trusts him, even though he killed how many people that they had saved including Sarah, who Sam liked.
I really love how Dean says how much he loves Sam, but how will Sam ever find someone to love when Dean never lets him get near anyone. And if Sam does, then he's betraying Dean. But Dean, wants Sam to have a life. Dean only wants Sam to hunt with him and that's what he's always wanted since the first season of the show. Sam has wanted a normal life, not a wife and kids and either being a hunter or Man Of Letters, but a normal life without all that. A normal life without the person he loves in danger all the time or if he had kids, their lives constantly being in danger. It wouldn't matter if he was a hunter or a Man Of Letters, his family would always be in danger.
I just hope the writers don't go and make Sam be a hypocrite at the end of this season or I really will be done with this show. I don't want Sam to try to save Dean's life like Dean tried to save Sam's by taking away Sam's free will. Dean always complains about Sam letting him down or making all the wrong choices, but Dean never looks at all the choices he makes and the consequences that follow.
Hopefully, there will be some more episodes like The Purge. It made me feel like I was watching the old Supernatural again. Anyone who has watched this show since the first season knows that it wasn't all sunshine and roses between Sam and Dean and that's one of the reasons why I loved it. One of my all time favorite scenes was in The Scarecrow when Dean said he would leave Sam's ass and Sam told him that's what he wanted him to do. I just hope the writers give us more of how Sam thinks and feels. I always wanted to know what Sam told that psychiatrist in Asylum about Dean. There has aways been tension between them from the start and I love seeing it.
I hope and pray my new found hope stays alive for the rest of the season and that the season finale isn't predictable with either Sam or Dean going somewhere again and being separated. I'm getting tired of that. I'd love for something to happen, but something to happen to both of them and not just one or the other. Now that would be a surprise for a change. All I can do is hope and now I have a tiny bit of it.
